Except when I go to sleep.
When I sleep, all bets are off. My anxiety is completely unbridled and manifests itself in my dreams. Honestly, I must have 8-10 dreams a night, which I think is why I never feel completely rested. Ever. I have three anxiety-driven recurring dreams, and let me tell you, they are beauties. I wake up in a cold sweat every time.
The first is always some variation of the following scenario: I'm in high school or college and I have to get to class. Only I can't remember what class it is. It's the middle of the semester; surely I've been to this class before...but I have no recollection of the location of the room or the identity of the professor. I wind up wandering all around campus, searching for a schedule of my courses, and never make it to class.
The second is simple: My teeth fall out. I dream this one at least every other week, and always wake up frantically rubbing my finger along my gums to see if I still have teeth. Sometimes I lose one at time, sometimes they all fall out at once.
The third is that I need to get somewhere, usually work, but I'm hopelessly lost and can't get to where I need to be. I try to call someone for directions, but I keep misdialing the number. I'll almost have the number dialed until I get to the last digit, and then I hit the wrong button and have to start all over.
The other night I had all three dreams in a row. Didn't get much sleep that night.
I wonder what all of this means? Especially considering that, despite the fact that I have 4- month-old twins and other mundane stuff, my life is relatively stress-free at the moment? I think Freud would have a field day with me....